NEW MUSIC FOR OLDS #7
Punchline Status...engage!
Well well well, look what we have here…
I knew you’d come crawling back. To your own inbox. To briefly open the newsletter you barely remember signing up for.
That’s okay—I’ll take what I can get! DEAR GOD, PLEASE DON’T LEAVE ME.
(Man, that deescalated quickly...)
In today’s NEW MUSIC FOR OLDS:
Romantic angst!
Brand name alt-americana!
The coolest guitar sound (and album cover) of 2022!
A plea for mercy!
Bad portmanteaus and wanton capitalization!
An introduction to Punchline Status!
And a book rec.
In the words of Tone Loc, let’s do it.
GOOD STUFF
As always, a Glossary of Terms.
SOAK, “last july”
Listen on Apple Music // Listen on Amazon Music
Album: If I never know you like this again
Nutshell: Heart-on-your-sleeve indie pop, a la early Tegan & Sara
Voltage: 6
Thoughts: I’d never heard of this young Irish songwriter before, but they (preferred pronoun) have got hooks for days. Just one hummable nugget after another, all coated in a pleasant layer of fuzz. The production isn’t super fussy—some of the vocal and guitar parts scream “first take”. But that’s a plus, as it keeps all the adolescent please-don’t-break-up-with-me yearnings in proper check. If I was a heartbroken 10th grader, I could see these lyrics meaning a lot to me—as an adult, it’s just a sweetly earnest guitar pop album you can enjoy without having to hit skip a bunch of times.
Pairing Suggestion: Offering a supportive hug to the nearest romantically overwrought teen
Wilco, “Story to Tell”
Listen on Apple Music // Listen on Amazon Music
Album: Cruel Country
Nutshell: Country-tinged Americana rock (You know…Wilco)
Voltage: 4
Thoughts: After twenty-seven years and twelve albums (more, if you count collaborations), you’re probably familiar with the musical artist known as Wilco, at least in an “I’ve been to Prague” kinda way. This latest album probably won’t make you reassess your priors, but it’s a solid reminder of why you may have loved the band in the first place. It’s no studio marvel like Summerteeth or Yankee Hotel Foxtrot—they’re done trying to make that type of album, far as I can tell. Rather, Cruel Country sounds like a guy who’s in a real groove and doesn’t want to ruin his flow by turning everything into Pet Sounds. Like most double albums, there’s some flab. But “Story to Tell” is one of the 8-10 tracks that feel canon-worthy. Nobody does breezy and bittersweet like Jeff Tweedy.
Pairing Suggestion: Kicking back on the front porch with a beer, right around dusk.
Cave In, “Waiting For Love”
Listen on Apple Music // Listen on Amazon Music
Album: Heavy Pendulum
Nutshell: Meaty, majestic metalcore (viva alliteration!)
Voltage: 8
Thoughts: Don’t put too much stock in the term “metalcore”—it sounds scarier than the genre it connotes. Just think “Chunky, streamlined hard rock with lots of syncopation”. The first thing you’ll notice is the soupy opening guitar riff, which sounds like a lava lamp being sucked into the Matrix. It is, in Metal terms, fukkin sick. And given that Cave In is from my home state of Massachusetts, let’s upgrade that to Wicked Fukkin Sick. Ignore the lyrics, which seem like a straightforward “where is this relationship going?” type deal, and focus instead on the overall vibe. I love the dramatic swell of the chorus section, in comparison to the casual, almost resigned vocal delivery. It’s like, “I don’t want to crush your skull, but (sigh) I suppose I must…”
Pairing Suggestion: Cleaning the dried blood off your sledgehammer
Like? Don’t like?
MEA CULPA
In NMFO #6, I mentioned I’d be writing something in depth about Kendrick Lamar’s latest album, Mr. Morale & The Big Steppers. And yet…
I may end up posting what I’ve cobbled together, but it was getting unwieldy and I started to question just how necessary my perspective is on the single most talked-about album of 2022. I have no desire to join “The Discourse”. If anything, my instinct is to abandon it like a baby bird touched by human hands1.
That said, I did bang out a few mostly-coherent paragraphs. If it’s of interest to anyone, speak up.
SOME BULLSHIT
A few thoughts, inspired by today’s “Good Stuff” artists:
THOUGHT NUMERO UNO
Attention must be paid to the album art for Cave In’s Heavy Pendulum. This thing is a goddamn masterpiece.
That sizzling bacon sound you hear? That’s my male adolescent notebook-doodling pleasure centers all firing off at the same time. A genuine duuuuuuuudegasm.
THOUGHT NUMERO DOS
SOAK (sic) is a terrible stage name. Just the pits. Were they on a band-naming deadline? According to their Wikipedia page, it’s a meant to be a portmanteau of “soul” and “folk”. Um…
First of all, no it’s not. That would be “SOLK”, which also stinks but is still somehow better than SOAK. If I saw a gig flyer for SOLK, I would assume they were some dweeby Scandinavian techno outfit. SOAK sounds like a cover band that plays Thursdays at the Tilted Kilt. All your favorite late-Nineties hits and $12 pitchers of Bud Ice!
Secondly, I really am enjoying this album, but there’s not an ounce of ‘soul’ to be found. Folk, sure. But this mostly mopey indie guitar pop is no closer to Motown than it is to Flavortown. If you’re gong to sandwich ‘Folk’ with another completely unrelated genre of music, make it more interesting. How’s about MERINGUOLK? ZYDECOLK, perhaps?. The artist’s given name is Bridie Monds-Watson, so why not go with BMW? It’s no dumber than SOAK and at least then there’d be a reason for the letters to be capitalized.
Speaking of, one of my Grumbly Old Man pet peeves is the recent trend of artists going all CAPS LOCK with band names and song titles. It’s especially egregious in pop and hip hop. My guess is, it’s 30% artistic license and 70% business strategy. ’m sure there’s market research that suggests using all caps makes your song 8% more likely to stand out from the other algorithmically chosen tunes in Spotify’s “SummaVibez” playlist or whatever. I find it extremely annoying, and I will yell at the first cloud that tries to tell me otherwise!
Here’s a 2019 exploration of the trend, which takes s a less fuddy-duddy stance (I’d argue it’s gotten markedly worse in the past three years). I will admit it’s no more annoying than the nineties/aughts trend of bands adding unnecessary punctuation. Looking at you, fun. and Godspeed You! Black Emperor!
(I’m giving a pass to stellastarr*, only because “My Coco” still rules.)
PENSAMIENTO FINAL
Earlier, I inferred that every one of you has a semi-educated opinion on Wilco. Obviously that’s not true. Despite longevity, they’ve never achieved (or sought?) mass recognition to the level of, say, a Springsteen or a Beyonce or a Lou Bega. Is Wilco a household name? Probably not. But they’re definitely an apartment sublet name—maybe even a vacation household name.
Wilco has, at the very least, achieved Punchline Status—meaning, you can derisively call someone a “Wilco fan” and most people will get the joke. 40-something former hipster. Scraggly beard. Drinks IPAs—you get the idea. In fact, the term “Dad Rock” was first popularized in a 2007 negative review of a Wilco album.
An off-the-dome list of artists who have achieved Punchline Status:
The Grateful Dead
Jimmy Buffet
Kenny G
Post Malone
New Kids/Backstreet/*NSync (Boy Band jokes are transferrable)
Twisted Sister
Barbra Streisand
Insane Clown Posse
Hootie and the Blowfish
Rick Astley
Morrissey
DJ Khaled
Radiohead
Creed/Nickelback/Puddle of Mudd (again, transferrable)
Toby Keith
Maroon 5
Coldplay
MC Hammer
I’m not sure many artists would consider Punchline Status emblematic of success, but it certainly ain’t failure.
Who am I missing?
One more Wilco-related thing:
It’s possible I’m feeling especially gracious towards Cruel Country because I recently read Jeff Tweedy’s 2020 book, How to Write One Song.
It is, quite literally, about writing one song. But it’s really a meditation on the artistic process in general, complete with creative exercises you can try at home. It’s geared toward songwriters, but most of what he has to say can be applied to any artistic discipline, pros and amateurs alike. It’s a warm, open-hearted gift of a book I’d recommend to anyone feeling a bit stuck.
A few snippets, culled from Goodreads:
“inspiration is rarely the first step. When it does come out of the blue, it’s glorious. But it’s much more in your own hands than the divine-intervention-type beliefs we all tend to have about inspiration. Most of the time, inspiration has to be invited.”
“Don’t undervalue things that come easy. Sometimes they’re the things that would be the hardest for someone else to do and often they are the things that would be almost impossible to do when you try too hard.”
“What you make of the song or what the world will make of it is of little concern when contrasted with the joy that I’ve talked about many times now—the joy of disappearing long enough to find something you didn’t know you had inside you.”
Tip: Choose the audio version, so you can hear how all of Tweedy’s noodling eventually coalesces into a song (in this case, “Gwendolyn”).
That’s a wrap on NMFO #7. Paid Subscribers, see you next week. Everyone else, see you mid-June. What’s that you say? You can’t wait that long? You need to get in on the hot Paid Subscriber action? Well, who am I to deny you…
In the other words of Tone Loc,
Fare thee well! and if for ever,
Still for ever, fare thee well:
Even though unforgiving, never
‘Gainst thee shall my heart rebel.
Did you know if you type "Kendrick" into Google, Kendrick Lamar is the first thing that comes up? He's the most popular Kendrick. NOW THAT'S A SHITPOST! (TM) I'm listening to him now and I dig it. If more music sounded like this I'd be excited. Except, you know, with singing.
Punchline Status... Dave Matthews Band.